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Trump for President? Trump’s Ego for Veep!

Americans are deep into their love affair with Trump, sort of like if your grandpa took up with a diseased crackhead because she was “fun.” Trump is funny in the same way a disturbed 12-year-old is funny: you never know what will come out of his mouth. More importantly, you have no idea if he even knows what he’s talking about. That’s Trump. Does anyone — other than the religious right people who are lauding a thrice-divorced philanderer as the second coming of Reagan — really think that Trump believes anything he says? Or, is he like an ad agency examining focus groups to determine what slogan works best for their toilet paper ads? Trump believes in only two things: himself and money, in that order.

All of a sudden he’s violently opposed to illegal immigrants — because I’m sure he’s never hired any of them to serve his needs — saying nasty things about Mexicans, for example. He’s saying these things not because he is deeply concerned about the issue but because he thinks the small town Iowans (who are representative of no one but other small town Iowans) care about the issue. If it turned out that Iowans wanted illegal immigrants, perhaps to do the menial jobs that no American would take, Trump would be flying his private jet to the border to provide free rides.

All politicians say what they think they have to — poor Bobby Jindal, an “anchor baby” himself , is campaigning against “anchor babies” — but it’s much more obvious in Trump. His ego could be his running mate. His narcissism is mind blowing. So why believe that anything he says is anything but him spouting off for the cameras, just as he has done for the last 35 years. He’s as phony as a puppet. His so-called “courage” in speaking out is just another outlet for his ego — he knows he doesn’t need the support of the GOP establishment, or anyone else, so he says mean, outrageous things that make his supporters cheer because they are too brainwashed to give what he says any real thought.

Trump is a hate-spouting tool, but if you think about it, he’s no more real than a pro wrestler breaking a chair over an opponent’s back.  Trump for Trump in 2016!

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How traumatic!

How traumatic!

Honestly, your opinions stink

This country has some serious problems.

The economy, for one.

And Afghanistan.

Maybe worst of all, the prospect of the next 10 months of election ads filled with eagles, American flags, babies, elderly World War II vets, kids on bikes, etc., backed by generic Aaron Copeland-esque music. The party doesn’t matter; just change the name.

That being said, a bigger problem is that on each of those issues — and millions more — we’re forced every day to hear the opinions of people who have no business giving opinions on anything, let alone major issues of the day. And we’re stuck with old/new media sources that seem to have no concept of what is important in the world. For example, CNN had a young woman blogger on today to discuss Obama’s recess appointment for the consumer protection bureau. Some of her comments: “Obama is trying to become dictator”; “Obama doesn’t care about the Constitution.”; “Obama wants to destroy America.” She looked very angry, and sounded very immature. Two things came to mind after hearing her screechy screed. First, does anyone past puberty really believe those things and based on what?

Second, what lazy/imbecilic CNN staffer decided that the inane opinions of some 23-year-old “blogger” from Whereverville, USA are worthy of wide distribution? It seems to me that she was spouting back old GOP press releases, which is fine if you’re into that sort of thing. But, honestly, why HER?  (Even beyond the fact that the young woman blogger was African-American, promoting a party with two presidential candidates today making semi-appalling comments about the black community: Gingrich and Santorum, you can look it up).

Don’t think for a second that my disgust is limited to young right-wing blogger women. No, it goes far beyond that. Why, for example, do we need to hear Anderson Cooper’s opinion on the Iowa primaries? And, why do we need to see TV reporters reporting on the reporters reporting on the candidates? Who cares if Candi Correspondent is cold standing outside the Cornview Diner in Cornview, Iowa, where candidates with no people skills — like Romney — can pretend to be fascinated by farmers stuffing their faces with sausage, even as they are no doubt popping anti-anxiety pills like Pez on their buses and washing their hands a thousand times a day in acid to destroy the germs.

Why are we even subjected to 24 hour coverage of caucuses in a tiny state that is about representative of America as a whole as Bosnia? Is the coverage really worth the devastating new worry lines on Diane Sawyer’s bottomed forehead? Anyone who pays attention to reality — which is not found on TV — knows that the Iowa caucuses count for nothing. They’re insider baseball, with no impact on anyone, except Michelle Bachmann, who will probably now spend her days blaming gay marriage for her humiliating defeat.

You might ask: “if you don’t like it, don’t listen to it.” Thanks for the advice. But a lot of people, myself included, care about what’s going on outside of our iPads. We want to hear about the state of the country and the world. Even some human interest stories (though jesus, enough with the cute stories about hamsters dialing 911 and saving their owner from choking on a pack of cigarettes). Forget local news sources — they’re idiotic and everything is “breaking news” now: “Breaking news at 6! I just pooped myself right at the anchor desk!” or “Breaking news at 11! Car accident in Chungchip, China kills a panda bear!” Let’s face it, some stations have news on from 4 p.m. to 6:30 p.m. even though there is not enough real local news to fill even 30 seconds. This also leads to horrific banter between anchors, which is a whole other story. (And am I the only one who thinks Anchorman Jack on WBZ-4 sounds exactly like Ted Baxter, except not, so far as I can tell, as fictional. Under 30s: Google The Mary Tyler Moore Show.)

I guess my point, assuming I even have to have one — as a blogger, isn’t it just assumed whatever I say is fascinating — is that a lot of people need to shut up, keep their opinions to themselves and log off. Candidates need to shut up unless they can say something that doesn’t include the words “Reagan,” “America’s Soul,” “socialist,” “abortion” and/or “my wonderful wife, Atalanta/Shirley/Zenobia/Ethel.” Just shut up.

Isn’t the world crappy enough without hearing angry young right-wing blogger girl squawk about things she has no knowledge of? And CNN, try to remember that just because a person has a mouth, it doesn’t mean we need to hear anything come out of it.